A quick flashback . . .

Note - the following post appeared on my old blog, sometime when I was still trying to update it regularly. Just a taste of the madness that perpetuates my life on a regular basis. Enjoy . . .


You know, sometimes I think that all the chants, dances and occasional ritual sacrifices I perform for the Comedy God, Laughamyassoff, are nothing more than a big waste of time. And chicken parts.

Then I get a softball like this lobbed towards me and realize that my offerings are noted and appreciated, and everything becomes right with the world again.

I've seen instances like this happen on television, or in the movies but I never in a million years thought that it would ever happen to me.

Hmm . . . sounds like I should be writing to Penthouse Forums, but unfortunately, this is not the case.

Thankfully, though it is much more hilarious.

While my job definitely still isn't fulfilling, one thing I can say about it is that it does provide me with plenty of amusement. Between the way some of the people on the floor dress and some of the conversations that I overhear, I could end up with enough material for the site to last me for some time.

However, this one takes the cake.

I was taking care of some business in the men's room this morning, when I noticed someone come out of the handicapped stall in the corner. After I wrapped up Little Rob and put him back home, I went over to the sink to wash my hands. This older foreign guy on our floor - who was the guy in the stall - was there washing his hands. Now, I've seen this guy on the floor several times, but I've never talked to him. Obviously, this was not a deterrent to him in the slightest.

What comes next is one of those things that makes you wish had a video camera with you when it happened. Because something this peculiar really needs to be shared with the world. Instead, you'll just have to settle for my personal account.
This is the actual conversation that followed:

MAN - Hello, my friend.

ME - Hi. How are you?

MAN - Good. [Pauses] So, in case you were wondering why there was no flush
of the toilet, it was because I didn't use it.

ME [Trying to feign interest] - Um, I'm sorry?

MAN - I said if you were wondering why there was no flush of the toilet, it was because I didn't use it.

ME [Hoping he would leave it at that]] - Oh.

MAN - I put my underwear on backwards and I needed to fix them.

ME - Yeah.

MAN - So, that is why there was no flush of the toilet, if you were wondering.

ME [Thinking the dirty pee-pee hands were a million times better than listening to this] - Um . . . ok. Thanks.

Now, I have to say that I'm really not sure what part of this scenario scares me the most. I mean, first of all, I'd be frightened if my best friend shared something like this with me, much less some weird old foreign guy whom I've never spoken to before. In a men's room, no less.

Then there is the obvious issue of the fact that not only did this guy put his underwear on backwards, but he felt that telling that to a complete stranger was less embarrassing then having said stranger think he didn’t flush the toilet in the men’s room. I don’t know what to do with this.

Except let you all read about it, of course.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen – this is the hell that is my life.

Welcome aboard.